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Monday, December 25, 2017

WHAT'S DONE TO CHILDREN THEY WILL DO TO SOCIETY

I have every reason to hate men since my bio dad was nothing more than a sperm donor the night my mother fucked him while married to my siblings father, and my step father was a Malignant Narcissist exhibitionist who made my childhood a living hell on earth. But I don’t hate men.. in fact I love men and struggle with loving women. I find enablers of abuse much more vile than the abusers themselves. My mother allowed all 4 of her children to be sexually, physically, and mentally abused by the men in her life and when I called her out for it I became the enemy of not only her but my siblings as well. Maybe that’s why I’m for the underdog, those without a voice, and the villain in all superhero movies? It seems the villain is the way they are for a reason. They are acting out because of what was done to them. It’s not an excuse but a reason. An explanation. And until they shed light on lies and their abuse they will continue to hurt and destroy others. Then there are those spineless cowards who enable the abusers vile behaviors because they’re too afraid to upset their own lives. I think of Dottie Sandusky . The evil bitch who defended her husband and vilified his victims for speaking out.

My step father was given up to live with his grandparents by his own mother while keeping his younger brother. Abandonment and rejection by ones own mother is severe abuse that will leave lasting scars. It’s no wonder my step father was a serial adulterer and womanizer constantly seeking the attentions and approval of women while cheating on my mother. To the outside world he was charming smart funny and successful. But behind closed doors to his own family he was a hateful monster. All the characteristics of a Malignant Narcissist. Since I've cut ties with him, my mother, and my siblings who stand by his side, I’m able to see things clearly. Although I detest him as a person, I also pity him. What his mother did to him doesn’t excuse his behaviors but it’s the reason he is so fucked up. Up until the death of his mother he still adored and respected her, hoping to get the love and affection he craved but never got. If only he confronted her and expressed his pain and anger maybe he would have taken the road of recovery and self reflection. But instead he denied it and let it eat him up inside. Malignant Narcissists loath themselves which is why they do what they do.


I hate his mother for the bitch that she was and the monster she created but a part of me feels sorry for the monster who made me the broken person that I am. It takes a lot of courage to shed light on those who abused you but it’s the only road to recovery and because I no longer have my mother or siblings in my life I was able to heal not only from alcohol and drug abuse but give a voice to my inner child and learn to love myself. I find strength and healing in giving others, especially MEN a voice. What’s done to children they will do to society. Denial is a dangerous thing and although the mind may forget the body never does which is why PTSD is very real. Society needs to realize women aren’t the only victims of abuse and they can be just as perverted evil and abusive as men if not more so.



Saturday, November 18, 2017

THE GOD VIRUS



I was reading a book called “The God Virus” and it helped me come to terms with WHY I got so deeply and dangerously involved in the Christian Cult. It explained what attracts the minds of people to certain religions and denominations. Evangelical Christianity is the most recent god virus of our time and one of the most deadly and severe. Very rigid thinking of black and white, right and wrong, with no grey areas. I believe my upbringing was lacking so many healthy boundaries and involved so much indifference towards things that should have mattered and when I finally had enough, this religious doctrine filled that void. It validated my thinking that some things really DO matter and some things ARE very bad which need to be exposed and condemned. I’m still very black and white in my thinking.

My dysfunctional family only had one written rule or boundary and that was NO exposing family secrets. No rebuking or holding people accountable. I still use the language of the god virus because that’s the only language I know to express the bullshit that I endured for so many years. Nobody ever told me it was okay to call evil things evil or hold people accountable for their wicked deeds. I didn’t know I could withhold forgiveness and reconciliation with unrepentant evildoers even if it was my own birth family!

The Christian doctrine is also helpful for those who are riddled with guilt and fear for their wrongdoings and abuse towards others. Really, the god virus is so cleaver to have every version available for every sick mind looking for a cure! These are the christians who share only the fluffy feel good bible verses showing a god of only love with no anger and wrath. These are the christians who I used to really hate. They obviously were so sick with guilt they had to reject half of the bible to believe in their own version of god. Why else is the bible so full of contradictions? It hooks people from every angle! 



If it wasn’t for my crazy love for the Palestinians and my anger and disgust at the Christian world for their hatred against them just for being Arabs of the wrong religion, I might still be a Jesus freak. Sure it was nice to think I had my own personal savior who loved and watched over me as his own. But when I looked at the suffering of the world around me and the injustice done to the innocent in his name I can’t believe in or love such a worthless absentee “father” god. If he does exist he can prove himself but until then I have no faith in or interest in a god of indifference.




Tuesday, November 14, 2017

HONOR THY MOTHER AND FATHER



I think society's obsession with "honor thy mother and father" is just as harmful to humanity as the "forgive and forget" psycho-babble. I think it’s the cause for so much unnecessary guilt, self hate, mental and physical illness. It also gives a green light for abuse to flourish.


People have no problem speaking out against abusive perverts but when it’s a parent, a mother especially, then it’s taboo. Even therapists fall for this harmful obsession. It wasn’t until I was given permission by a therapist to SAY that my parents were monsters, and I wanted NOTHING to do with them, that I began to heal. Christianity kept me stuck. I was rushed into the forgiveness mode. I was told I must honor and love my parents. So I said it until I thought I felt it but really I was faking it because deep down, once I accepted the truth and confronted my parents with it, I was livid. I was scared, hurt, angry, sad, and the last thing I wanted to feel was love and forgiveness. 



My writings were dark and hateful, all matching up with the Bible of course. The angry jealous possessive god of war who was going to come down and destroy all of my enemies. He would bring recompense and justice. So I stuffed down my hatred, anger and pain knowing in time wrath would come. If my other human emotions came up I was told it was of the Devil and not of god. No wonder so many christians are riddled with guilt and self hate!


Since I’ve left the tribal bible cult, I have learned to take off the mask and acknowledge ALL of my emotions. Not just the "good ones", but sadness, anger, wonder, despair, fear, and hatred. I don’t think it’s wrong to hate certain people for the things they do. It’s called being human. It’s when we act on that hate and get enjoyment out of hurting others that it’s a problem. 



Studies have shown that people who deny themselves their true feelings, tend to act out in forms of rape, murder, or self harm. Could it be that they’re afraid of breaking the commandment Thy Shall Honor Thy Parent? Even those parents who sexually abused them? Beat them? Tried to kill them? Humiliated them? Instead of being able to express their anger or hatred towards their own mother/father they had to release it onto others. (society is obsessed with the idea of all moms being loving and tender. In all of the memoirs I've read most of the time it was the mother who was the molester/abuser) 


Ever see the Alfred Hitchcock movie Psycho? I don’t believe people are born evil like I used to in my christian cult days. I think our childhood from the second we’re born determines who we become. Some people have lived through hell as children and grow up to be empathetic loving people. Others become Narcopaths. I could be wrong but I believe those who don't allow themselves to feel ALL human emotions, are the ones who turn into psychopaths and serial killers. And I believe the cultural brainwashing tactic of honor thy mother and father is the main reason for their denial and fear of feeling. 



Children with loving parents will love their parents. They don’t need a commandment demanding them to. And no abusive monster deserves honor or love unless they stop abusing. Even if that abuser is a mother. It’s time we stop making victims feel guilty for exposing and shunning an abusive parent and do away with the bible standards of living and this antihuman bullshit psychobabble.




Thursday, November 2, 2017

CIRCUMCISION OF THE HEART




The last 60 seconds of this mans video really got me thinking. He says the world has had an emotional circumcision..empathy has been cut away from the human heart. It led me to thinking about what Jesus said in the Bible. Circumcision of the heart replaced the Old Covenant of genital cutting. But when you think about what circumcision really is and what it actually removes then you understand more what circumcision of the heart means. 

Male circumcision amputates the most sensitive part of the penis therefore circumcision of the heart would remove the sensitivity of the heart. Just like male circumcision hardens and callouses the glans/head of the penis circumcision of the heart would create a hardened less sensitive heart. And when you read the nightmarish stories in the Bible it’s no wonder Christians are robotic heartless and immune to their god’s criminal commands and deeds!

I’ve spoken to many Christians who agree with the slaughter and torture their god performed against children and animals in the Bible and they ALL call it righteous holy and good! just because the book says so.

I’ve read and listened to many testimonies from men who hate their circumcision and are suffering on a daily basis in more ways than one because of it and it breaks my heart to no end. I don’t care if there are men out there who love their cut up penises and sex lives. Good for them! But my concern is for those who are NOT happy about their cut up penises. Why are these men being ignored! Silenced! Shamed!

I believe this man is 100% right on the money regarding his last statement in this video. Since I’ve started Intactivism I’ve only spoken to a handful of people who agree that infant genital cutting is cruel sick and twisted. Most people defend it, condone it, and support it wholeheartedly. And most all of them are men who’ve been cut themselves! This sick American tradition is kept alive by it’s own victims because they’re too prideful ignorant and ashamed to admit they’ve been sexually damaged. And shame on those women who body shame guys into thinking they need their penis parts amputated before they'll go down on them. EVIL BITCHES! Your vaginas stink too when you don't care for it properly and are much more prone to nasty smelly infections than a penis is!




Muslims Jews and American’s are the only culture who sexually mutilate their children. They’re also the most violent. Coincidence? I think not.


Tuesday, October 3, 2017

OBSESSIVE EPIPHANY


When I finally woke up and was able to see just how dysfunctional my birth family was I became obsessed about it. I became obsessed with the hows and the whys and that’s when I became extremely educated about Malignant Narcissism. This started my journey into the Christian Bible and when I knew it like the back of my hand and saw how it was being used in politics and society as a tool to justify the unjustifiable, I left the Christian Cult for good. Just like I left my entire birth family for good when I realized how toxic and dangerous they were. This was no easy thing to do and I believe that’s why I dove so deeply into my belief of the Bible god because so much of it’s writings confirmed my feelings about shunning evil doers until and unless they repent. Religion is like a magnet to the afflicted and forsaken. So when my birth family rejected me, god/religion was the perfect cure.

Like so many who grow up in a dysfunctional abusive family they don’t realize just how abnormal their family behaviors were until they separate themselves from it or see how other families operate. It wasn’t until I went to a therapist who told me my parents should have both been locked up for a very long time did I realize just how justified I was to divorce my “parents.” It was no use in explaining my decision with my siblings because out of self preservation they had to deny reality. They live in denial to this day. Since then, I have become obsessive about exposing lies and deceptions that society likes to deny, condone, or tolerate either out of ignorance or their own self preservation. And just like my family rejected me, most will do the same. And I’m completely okay with that. I’m at the point in my life that I no longer need “friends” or approval for who I am and what I do. There is a wonderful sense of freedom and peace that comes with that!

Imagine it’s culturally acceptable in your country to cut off the right arm of all newborn babies. (You know where I’m going with this!) You have an epiphany and start to question this strange amputation ritual and realize that the rest of the world doesn’t do this! In fact, they say your country is wrong to do so! When you try to educate others to this fact, most people completely ignore you and the few who DO respond angrily insist that they function just fine with one arm. Others say they want their kid to look like their one armed mommy/daddy, (to prevent locker room teasing) it looks better, it prevents disease, and babies don’t even remember the pain of their amputation. Of course most get angry when you tell them they have been mutilated and are not a full functioning person like those who have 2 arms. Some even say, “It makes no difference to me… one arm or two arms, I see no difference at all. Why are you making such a big deal about it???”

Would this not make you a little neurotic? Obsessive? I started questioning this tradition the first time I heard about the disgusting Jewish oral circumcision ritual. Then when I heard the horrific screams of these poor infants during the 20-30 minute procedure I became obsessive. Also, I know what it’s like to have those who are supposed to love and protect you, harm and damage you. There are things that were done to me as a child that had a life long effect on the person I am today. I will never be the person I could have been had I been raised in a loving and safe environment.  That was stolen from me along with the life long benefits that come with it. Just like the men today who have been circumcised and are forever damaged from it. I know how they feel when they’re rejected for speaking out against what was so wrongfully done to them. But they aren’t speaking out for pity or attention and they’re not going out harming others. They’ve dedicated their lives to stop this barbaric inhumane tradition for the sake of future babies and men. They also don’t care what others think about their choice to speak out on a subject so many are not only ignorant about but ashamed and embarrassed when it’s brought up. I think it’s shameful and disgusting that American’s protect the genital rights and integrity of girls but not boys! Shame on you America!!


I’m sorry that so many American men have had this unnecessary amputation done to them. But am I supposed to lie and say you’re better off with one arm instead of 2? I’m not saying you are unloveable, gross, unworthy, or a reject. But I am saying that because of America’s deceptive medical professionals who preyed on the ignorance of your parents, you are not who you could have been. You had a very special part of your body stolen from you against your will and in a VERY brutal way. Scientific studies have proven that the trauma you endured during your amputation has lifelong effects on your brain development and function. I am sorry, you didn’t deserve that! But I can not be quiet because you’re offended. For the sake of little boys and men to come I will continue to speak out along with many other men and women both young and old, circumcised and uncircumcised. Circumcision is the most common surgery performed in America. Educate yourselves. Watch a Circumcision. We’ve been lied to and it needs to end.


mcision Man Researches CircumcisionCIRCUMCISION... HOW TO BREAK A BABY'S SPIRIT






Thursday, August 3, 2017

FLYING MONKEYS



"Learning to live with the heartbreak of family betrayal  is a difficult and time-consuming process, especially after enduring what might seem like or has truly been a lifetime of suffering at the hands of Domestic Abusers.

Doing so requires mindfulness, a hell of a backbone, and ultimately a positive attitude of gratitude.

But it’s hard to feel happy about being abused — and it’s even harder to feel good about watching people you’ve known forever literally turn their backs on you when and if you out an Abuser.

Suggest something as outlandish as having all the family members come together to stop enabling a Cluster Bfamily member, or to watch while you sit back feeling powerless to defend yourself from smear campaigns started by an angry, socially toxic con artist who is actively preying on you or your family member(s) and LOOK OUT.

Chances are you will immediately become persona non-grata at ever family function, smear campaigned against in the most brutal of ways, and the stories you hear told about yourself won’t even sound familiar to you.

Such people are commonly known in self-help social circles as Flying Monkeys. When and if they band together to support or socially back a stronger predator, the Narcissistic Abuse tactic they are using is referred to as mobbing — a pitchfork in hand, led by a fork-tongued abuser style mob ready to do or say anything they can to ensure that whoever is targeted for exile.

Their primary goal and pleasure in life is to control other people’s psychology, emotions, and personal lives. Preferred scapegoat targets and anyone who purposefully or inadvertently become whistleblowers are socially shamed to the point of no return with regard to being functionally allowed to be allowed to live life with dignity.

The number one goal of Abusers and their Flying Monkeys (a.k.a. ENABLERS) is to ensure all Narcissistic Supply sources remain under their constant psychological control. If a target is financially, spiritually, and emotionally crushed, the hope in every abusive social predator’s basket of deplorable dreams is to have their targeted Narcissistic Abuse victims return to the fold, begging for love, affection from the predators, and the entire clan’s social re-acceptance and mercy.

It’s a heartbreaking and life changing experience for most, either being abused by narcissistic people or watching those to whom they have always supported and done nothing but love and trust align with people who situationally abuse.

But honestly, it’s the name of the game. ALL — and we do mean ALL Cluster B people manufacture triangulations, pathologically lie to alleviate boredom, and will do or say whatever it takes to self-promote while destroying another person’s life, mental health, and spiritual state.

Narcissistic Abuse is always about one person having power and control over another person’s psychology and emotions. Nothing good ever comes of it, either for the abused or in the cosmic sense for the Abuser.

People who betray friends and family members in order to elevate their own social status in and among toxic peers or toxic family members are guilty of a double moral crime — overlooking and subsequently enabling abuse.

Mobbing — meaning ganging up to talk trash, menace, and humiliate a target while banding together and taking pride from feelings of social inclusion — is truly one of the least attractive sides of human psychological compulsion to witness. Especially when you are the Frankenstein monster of sorts being hunted by toxic family members or targeted.

Flying Monkeys take several forms when and if they elect to jump on the bandwagon in order to make themselves feel like part of the “in crowd”. In their manner of vertical (rather than horizontal) thinking, in order for them to feel successful, there has to be a winner — but more importantly, they must create then totally socially, personally, and most oftentimes professionally annihilate anyone they deem a LOSER.

Some conformist adult children willingly align themselves with social predators in order to themselves escape abuse.

Others do so because they feel with another sibling or person out of the way, the charming Abuser will bestow on them something akin to “Golden Child” status.

Hoping to be treated like they are worthy, such people tend to emulate the abuser… ruthlessly striving to prove how BAD their sibling or a rival is for doing nothing more wrong than being born or breathing.

Most conformist children secretly hate or deeply mistrust Abusers but will suck up compulsively in order to do things like jockeying for more favorable positioning with elderly people. Seriously —CONFORMIST ADULT CHILDREN who have been raised by or around toxic peers are quite simply NEVER good people.

Many are readily willing to admit behind the back of the Matriarch or Patriarch of the family unit they seek to impress that they are hoping that when that person or couple dies, they (the Abuse Enabler) will have ingratiated themselves enough to sidewinder bypass an abuse victim in order to financially steal the inheritance.

It’s all about feeling like THEY are more powerful, somehow smarter for being Machiavellian, and to prove to those they hurt that they — as the former lackey, are somehow entitled to wear their abusive parent’s imaginary crown.

Whatever the case, family members who elect to overlook and enable abuse do something far eviler than the two karma inducing things enabling and overlooking abusers do.

When Enablers choose to socially and publicly align with situational abusers who lie about the moral crimes they commit in secret, they themselves actually BECOME ABUSERS.

How do you know when they have been socially lured to embrace the dark side of the personality force?

When and if they:

engage in the act of mobbingor play both sides of the fence,spyingand lying to both sideswhile rubberneckingand fostering more social mayhem.

By compounding pre-existing things like sibling rivalries, parent-child estrangement, or fully artificially devised, sabotaging triangulations, you know both who they are by nature as well as the type of people they choose to be based on their own desire of personality qualities to nurture.

That’s right — Flying Monkeys who support abusive, dishonest, lying, sadistic, or covertly manipulative personality types, simply by their choice to stand on the side of a predator over rationally and empathically validating a victim and seeking to stop enabling social predators, become something called ABUSERS BY PROXY.

And yes, that’s a moral crime — something that is akin to being the “get-away driver” for a bank robber. Make no mistake about it.

There truly is no other interpretation. It’s dangerous to minimize, overlook, or to try to sweep bad behavior under the rug when and if you are confronted with having to deal with social predators.

Moral crimes are those social injustices that no one can quite seem to hold another person socially or legally accountable for, in general. Deplorable behavior is deplorable whether a person can be or is ever arrested for it or not.

Moral crimes are things like promoting or enabling hate speech, telling lies to avoid personal responsibility, misleading friends and family members about private action as well as falsifying public image, and doing things like simply behaving in public one way while acting totally different in private whenever.

In close-knit families with many siblings, toxic parents strategically triangulate children and grandchildren.

Triangulation is meant to foster sibling rivalry, and most toxic senior citizens who have raised children to socially and emotionally compete for their approval, attention, and affection (as well as protection) themselves typically report having been parented in a Narcopathstyle by their own elders.

What’s more, toxic senior citizens who have raised families that divide tend to report that they grew up estranged from their own siblings emotionally, physically, or psychologically. That’s not by accident, either.

The more toxic a parent — especially a mother figure or female role model — the more likely siblings are to have been socially nurtured to think like conformists, competing with targeted or scapegoat family members for the proverbial one-upmanship status Cain and Abel already tried.

Narcissistic mother figures tend to thrive socially and emotionally by pitting their children and grandchildren against one another. The more a child strives to win favor with the parent, the more likely the other siblings are to feel less loved, less appreciated, less valuable, and ultimately LESS LIKED.

Having parents who like you — rather than simply barking out hollow terms that they love you — is a huge deal. People who grow up to have close personal relationships with their parents as friends tend to have the most stable families and personally fulfilling home lives.

But people who grow up with role models that declare stupid colloquialisms like “Because I’m your mother and I said so, that’s why!” in anything other than a truly joking, loving tone are likely to feel the sting of their parents toxic thought patterns and accepted belief systems. This phenomenon tends to produce in an adult child a socially and psychologically perceptible sting.

Nasty parents will smear campaign against an offspring the very same way a toxic adult child will do all they can to socially and emotionally target and invalidate a sibling with whom they have always felt less kinship and more rivalry. If the Golden Child of the family does something to displease a parent, watch how fast narcissistic and anti-social family members will slide right into position themselves as the new preferred favorite while hoping to keep the parent functionally estranged from a sibling!

Why would they do such a thing? Beyond the obvious SELF STROKING OF THEIR OWN EGOS, the biggest suck-ups in the family are typically those status oriented, socially and emotionally competitive family members who are above all else greedy and obsessed withWINNING.

That’s where betrayal comes into play, as people with Covert Narcissistic tendencies who harbor secret ill will against a family member or close personal friend tend to start sucking up copiously.

The pattern includes former spouses of adult children sucking up to former in-laws in an attempt to socially promote themselves while they rubberneck and meddle in their former love interest’s life, people who see senior citizens as weak-minded and easily able to be manipulated psychologically and emotionally into leaving themselves or their own children money in wills, and those who just plain don’t like an abuse target personally (but have always kept that fact a secret in order to avoid that person finding out they were two-faced, self-centered, and ethically duplicitous).

Parents who abuse their children often raise at least one in four of their children to be abusive. They persistently tend to enable that person, while showering them with compliments and absolutely unwavering social protection.

Parents who have several children raise runners, lost children, rebels, and golden children. The Abuser in the family (as the adult offspring most likely to conform to the abusive parents Cluster B thinking) does not necessarily take on the role of Golden Child, however, in the family structure.

That title tends to be afforded to the most self-interested and self-centered of all the siblings. Golden Children tend to strive to please and impress their toxic parents by sucking up, speaking one way to their face and another completely behind their back.

Understand that this is the personality type most likely to manufacture chaos, to betray their sibling’s confidences, and to ruthlessly do whatever it takes to make sure their material and social status is secured.

Sometimes that person is the adult child of a toxic parent, notably a conformist or Golden Child by both nature and nurture.

But it could be the sibling of a toxic parent, an ex-husband or an ex-wife, a grandchild who takes after theCluster B grandparent by genetic nature, or a person who has hung around and weaseled their way into the family network with the sole intent of spying, sabotaging interpersonal relationships, and compulsively seeking “validation” as a person who matters to the targeted family for years.

Noting that Abusers lie, blame shift, victim shame, and do or say anything they can to make people like them while they strive to socially destroy the reputation of a targeted Narcissistic Abuse victim, weak predators who suck up to Cluster B personality types tend to have a rude awakening in later years.

As senior citizens, people with full-blown personality disorders or extreme entitlement issues tend to get old without ever socially or emotionally maturing. What that means is, once the nicest people in the family have been “run off”, that the care of the elderly falls into the laps of those the least inclined to give up their own lives, lifestyles, money, or time to do it.

This places the toxic senior in a more vulnerable position than many of them who realize the reality of what they have done typically care to admit. If they were Somatic Narcissists when they were younger, age and failing health issues tend to dysregulate them psychologically and emotionally speaking quite a bit.

Most children who are targeted for abuse by a toxic family self-identify with preferred scapegoat status. Parents encouraging siblings with more aggressivepersonality types to pick on and abuse emotionally sensitive, thoughtful, and reflective children tend to end up stuck living with their nastiest offspring or shuttled off to places like assisted living facilities or nursing homes rather than being cared for lovingly and compassionately by their “overly sensitive” adult child types.

Children of toxic parents have tough life choices to make when it comes to deciding how to handle parenting strife. If adult children are toxic themselves, many relish at the opportunity to abuse their senior citizen age parent in private at every opportunity.

Why?

Because Cluster B people are simply all alike. Being able to abuse a parent who abused or neglected THEM as children is their ultimate joy, “victory dance”, and pride in life.

But if that parent gets savvy and wise to their toxic adult children’s (or toxic adult grandchildren’s) mind game, chances are incredibly high that their own narcissistic streak will let them go out on an emotional high note.

All of them — whether 30 or 80 — will tend to revert to playing childish psychological games to drive their caregivers crazy. Most, when and if they can gain access to a lawyer or accountant, will do things like move money around in secret and do things like write people in and out of wills in secret — so when they finally DO kick-off, they have the last laugh burning people who traded valuable years of their life and countless dollars trying to ensure their comfort.

That’s the most common horror story reported by children of all ages whose parents had Cluster Bpersonality disorder issues.

So many of them write the people who care for them the most out of their wills in secret or wipe people’s names off life insurance beneficiary lists with a vendetta agenda or out of pure ill-intentioned spite that is like meeting a unicorn when and if a loving adult child says they were well taken care of or provided for by a nasty parent when they die.

Take for example the Celebrity Narcissist news story about Aaron and Tori Spelling. When Aaron died, he was worth a fortune. But do you think he left his fortune to his daughter Tori?

No.

Aaron Spelling left his mansion, the bulk of his wealth, and complete control of his estate and holdings to his Somatic Narcissist wife Candy. Not to the mother of his children, mind you. To an evil Narcissist he trusted to do the right thing as the executor of his last will and testament, a woman expected to fairly distribute his personal property and holdings.

But guess what.

Mama Candy decided that her beloved husband’s daughter deserved virtually nothing. Candy kept the mansion. Candy kept the art. Candy kept the house. Candy kept the furnishings. Candy kept the stocks and bonds and financial assets. Candy, Candy, Candy, Candy, Candy…

And Tori? The daughter Aaron treated and raised like a Golden Child, doted on, and paid more attention to in life that he did the wicked wife?

Guess what she inherited after spending a lifetime following her father’s orders, striving her best to please and impress him? Bupkis.

Yes, you did read that right.

Unbeknownst to Tory, when her father married Candy, Candy — a Somatic Narcissist as his lawful wife — stood to inherit EVERYTHING. Trusting her to behave ethically was Mr. Spelling’s biggest mistake. Either that, or he was one of the meanest and most toxic rich parent snakes alive.

Tory ended up net gaining roughly 800K plus a carload of items from her father after spending her entire life thinking that both she and her own children would be financially protected, safe, and provided for in life. To some, that might sound like a windfall of cash — until you realize that Tori’s father left over 600 MILLION DOLLARS in estate holdings, micromanaged and kept for her own personal use by his greedy, rapacious, and narcissistic spouse.

Now, some toxic thinkers raised to read greed into our above statements are likely to say a parent owes a child nothing when and if they die.

But we’re not talking about parents who never lead children or adult children down the primrose path of believing if they allow parents to dominate their time, ruin their marriages, destroy their own relationships with their own kids while striving to please their unpleasable parent, and spend literally decades being verbally and personally abused by a parent who dangles things like “family honor” and sentimental possession inheritances in front of children in order to manipulate and savagely control their adult children’s lives.

We’re talking about nasty people who hold things like personal property from ancestors and family photos hostage.

We’re talking about parents who themselves pulled Candy Spelling maneuvers with trust funds left for grandchildren with the sole aim of easing their OWN financial and physical burdens in life.

We’re talking about parents who are so toxic that never one during the course of their natural born life did they do a single nice thing for a child without that child being pledged into indentured servitude for life. And we’re also talking about parents who — for WHATEVER they say is or was their reason — never one put their own child or adult child’s current or future-based needs above their own sense of material comfort or social pleasure in life.

To be told daily that if you just follow a parent’s orders, take their personal life advice, and fall into line makes you a part of the family is hard enough… but toxic parents who use money and sentimental property possessions as a weapon or tool to manipulate their adult children into kissing their ass for 80 plus years based on the promise that the time they trade doing so (as lost fiscally productive years) will be “made up for” when and if inheritance time comes near can truly leave an elderly parent’s primary social and emotional caregiver and companion unprepared.

That means no matter how much a disenfranchised offspring who is and has been nothing historically but a sensitive, emotional, loving, kind person striving to help their own parent of nuclear family of birth improve and elevate their conscious connection is accused of being “greedy” or “selfish” for feeling hurt when and if they are financially or socially shunned, the accusation is based on an illogical presumption that the same things motivate an Empath or HSP [Highly Sensitive Personality type] as does a person whose brain bio-mechanically operates in such a way that they socially, emotionally, and psychologically typify that of a person who is by nature or nurture a Cluster B.

You see, the primary motivator is LOVE seeking validation and ultimate harmony for most HSP individuals. Living life from a high EQ as well as IQ perspective tends to produce mature thinkers, noting that someone who is chronologically age 12 is likely to be twice as mature as a 50-year-old person who has a personality disorder like NPD, HSP, BPD, or a truly anti-social ASPD personality.

Be mindful that toxic parents raise messed up children at best. That includes scapegoats, children who rebel as black sheep of the family, those who enable while basking in Golden Child status with glory, and abusive conformists who take after their rotten mother or toxic father figures, too.

As such, the recommendation is to depersonalize abuse, disengage from a social relationship with any person who sucks up to a known Abuser, and take a life skills tip from those who are primarily self-centered, shallow, and egocentric.

Protect your OWN interests physically and financially. Stop sending all your retirement money and savings to help buy gifts for a mother who gives back little (if anything) and appreciates NOTHING. Stop taking crap from your angry and verbally abusive dad who was never there for you as a child but now demands you enable your toxic mom to abuse your fiscally, socially, emotionally, and financially.

Walk away from that nasty grandparent who did nothing but try to get you to disrespect your own loving parent while they compete with their own child for YOUR affection as their target possession acquisition.

The money you stand to inherit will never replace thetrust and (honestly) unconditional love of a kind-hearted parent.

It also won’t undue karma you create for yourself when and if you choose to accept the 30 pieces of silver a toxic abuser offers you to become their pet Flying Monkey — using and abusing YOU by pretending to genuinely care for YOUR long term best interests when all they really want to do is make sure your betrayal of a parent makes YOU an Abuser By Proxy, breaking the heart of your loving mom or devoted father.

And by all means if your sister or brother treated you terribly as a child, don’t waste one moment of your time worrying about making nice with them in order to please an enabling parent.

Let mom or pop take over the role of trying to deal with them — something they failed to do when you were kids, leaving them free to situationally abuse while parents did their own thing like sit at cocktail parties, avoid family responsibilities by claiming they “had to work”, spent countless hours avoiding true parenting responsibilities by engaging in busy work, or they played golf at the country club with absolutely zero care, concern, or remorse!

If a sibling showed signs from a young age of developing a Cluster B personality disorder in their childhood years, chances are that without serious behavior management and family-supported proper socialization of a child that they grew up to have “bona fide” personality disorders.

Early predictors include children likely to developNarcissistic Personality Disorder showing signs of having had Oppositional Defiant Disorder during their middle school and teenage years and kids likely to develop Anti-Social Personality Disorder having exhibited all the traits of little people who had Childhood Conduct Disorder.

Parents who have Cluster B are easy to spot. They glorify themselves, act with raging entitlement issues, tend to be the first people to point out why everyone they come into contact with owes them respect and should treat them like royalty, and they will be quick to point out everything in the world wrong with everyone but themselves — especially taking great delight in socially or emotionally shaming and publicly humiliating you.

Identifying a Cluster B sibling requires honest forensic psychology work. If you do an inventory of memory, chances are that your sibling’s personality by the time they were age 6 was fully formed, whatever it was at that stage of the game is exactly where they are most likely to revert to by core nature when and if stress in them forms.

Both parents and their toxic adult children tend to revert to raw, more primal “id” states of explosive rage-a-holics and become more (rather than less) sinister and self-centered as they age.

Time is never the friend of a Narcissist, and it damn sure never favors a Sociopath, Histrionic personality type, or person who shows symptoms of having Borderline Personality Disorder, either.

If you are expecting a Cluster B parent or a sibling to mature as they age, to realize the error of their ways, and to make your own brutal life history up to you in the end, you might want to consider buying that bridge in Brooklyn rumored to be for sale by toxic parents for YEARS.

Bridge the gap intellectually between what the reality of personality profile traits for Cluster B people and the Cognitive Dissonance inspired dream that you have that your parents and family members love and want what is best for you in order to save yourself from having the proverbial rug pulled out from under you.

Learning how to detach from the dream of having a family that loves and supports you is the hardest part.

But once you realize that the nicer you are to Cluster Bpredators you are, the more likely they are to loathe, abuse, and ridicule you they will be, the faster you will be able to celebrate your first birthday — 12 months after going NO CONTACT with any person who enables, enacts, excuses, or willfully chooses to self-promote while deliberately and consciously overlooking Narcissistic Abuse issues.

The faster you come to realize that when and if a toxic family unit comes bonding together to show solidarity in targeting one or more family members for Narcissistic Abuse, they accomplish one very real thing only in their attempts to socially undermine, psychologically destroy, and completely emotionally invalidate you. They pledge allegiance to the continuation of toxic family dysfunction.

What that means is, whatever time and money you lose is well spent to have such low-rent, vile-natured, morally insane people out of your life. Learning to live with family betrayal is something that takes time, patience, daily reflection, and above all else a strong self-help themed forensic psychology education.

With any luck the blood money and personal self-aggrandizement they engage in, treading on the backs of fallen, more emotionally sensitive and morally righteous family members who end up spending countless hours in agony, ruminating over the pain caused to them by people who by blood allegiance should have felt morally compelled to both love and protect them… with any luck, the Karma bus won’t be gentle when and if it’s driver comes back around for them.

And no — to hope that a person who harms you is held personally accountable for their actions is not wrathful. It’s trusting the universe to handle its business, noting that nice guys finish last for a PURPOSE.

For some, that purpose is to have enough time on the proverbial life pond to heal. For others, it is likely to land them in the loving arms of their creator after death, knowing they lived a good life striving to be a good person rather than acting like a grab-me-gotcha personality who relentlessly strove to one-up others by cheating, lying, and backstabbing with zeal.

But be hesitant to spend too much time wishing, thinking, or hoping a person or peer group that abused or actively strives to invalidate your fundamental human rights as a person “gets theirs”. After all, the more time you spend judging their motivations, intents, and misdeeds, the less time you have to spend purposefully designing the next stage of your own emotionally freed and well-balanced life.

When and if extreme feelings of emotional toxicity, moral outrage, and sourceless anxiety arise, go back to the basics. Read a self-help article written by an expert on dealing with Cluster B personality types. Check out a new research article about how to successfully cope with or self-manage C-PTSD issues. Do some yoga, go for a walk, scream into a pillow, or cry it out in a bathtub filled with sparkling, clean, healing waters and 2 big cup fulls of magnesium replenishing Epsom salts.

“Feel the feels…” as Spartan Life Coach Richard Grannon might say… or laugh their ridiculously hurtful, patently obvious attention-seeking and grandiose behaviors off as the wise young YouTube guru from someplace like Self Care Haven advises. Then, think things through.

If you are living in the present, the past helped create you. If you live in the now, look around wherever you are right now, at this very moment. Unless someone is making a Jack Nicholson face, wielding an ax, and busting through a door to try to physically murder you, chances are you can list 10 things you are happy about, feel positive about, or are absolutely grateful for having today.

And that’s how you do it. That’s how you survive.

Let the emotional angst caused by Narcissistic Abuse wash through rather than sticking to you. Live life 200 feet ahead of you at a time, just as the author of the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” creator Jack Canfield advises people to do.

And no matter what, remember this one thing…

NEVER RUN BACK TO THE PEOPLE THAT HURT YOU WHEN AND IF YOU SEEK EMOTIONAL VALIDATION.

The only validation you need is recognizing what is and what is NOT Narcissistic Abuse. After recognizing that, do a forensic analysis of yourself as it related to having been affected by your life experiences.

You are who you decide to be — and whichever wolf you choose to feed in your own inner psychology is the core personality most likely to become the dominant one, fast.


Be grateful for the very real fact you yourself are unlikely to be sucked into making things like other people’s personal life dramas worse by engaging in acts of mobbing. Count your lucky stars if you understand why inheritance is about validating love and care for the person inheriting, eschewing things like greed and blood money.

Then, be perfectly happy to strike the first match when and if it’s truly the right time in life to burn bridges with people you in no, way, shape or form would ever be physically or emotionally safe being around.

Those kinds of people — no matter WHO they are or THINK they are — have absolutely no reason or right to rent space in your head, let alone to someday stage a hovering coup-style attempt to return." Credit:


Saturday, July 8, 2017

ADDICTION




I once read that when you become sober from alcohol or drug addiction that void becomes filled by another addiction. Mine became god. I immersed myself to the point my husband started researching “addicts of religion” It’s funny how alcohol addiction is tolerated and acceptable by society. When I was a drunk I had many acquaintances and a pretty good social life. Once I gave it up though, things changed. My new addiction wasn’t acceptable, cool, funny, or relatable. Being sober made me aware and no longer in denial about things.  Add to that, a religion that shines light on lies and “sinful” behavior made me an unbearable nuisance to be around and I don’t blame anyone for hating who I had become. 

After 25 years (from age 14-40) of stuffing down harsh realities and numbing my pain with alcohol what the fuck was I supposed to do? I turned to god for answers and comfort. Most alcoholics have the love and support of friends and family to get them through, but my family were all still drunks stuffing down their own realities and pain. They offered no love and support at all, only ridicule, hate, blame, and denial. Who else could I turn to? I turned to god. And so the addiction began and no matter who was against me it didn’t matter because I had “him” on my side.

I did horrible things during those 2-3 years of my sobriety and religion addiction. My husband even sent me to therapy. Looking back now, I wish they put 2 and 2 together and SEE that I was simply replacing one deadly addiction with another. But unfortunately they were Christian councilors. That’s like going to a drunk for therapy. They too were deluded. One counselor, however, did tell me that my step father and mother should have been sent to prison a long time ago for what they did. It felt good to finally get some validation for that.

Sobriety sucks. Reality sucks. But somehow it’s better than being an obnoxious drunk. I no longer wear a mask or fear what others think of me or tolerate hurtful abusive behavior from anyone. My kids are no longer exposed to my demented family members and they don’t miss them one bit. I hope I broke the cycle for their sake and their kids sake. 


I no longer pretend I’m healed or better than anyone else like I did with god. (That was another painful breakup) I accept that I’m broken from my fucked up childhood and the people that destroyed me willingly or unwillingly. I have issues that can never be fixed. But being aware of those truths doesn’t change anything really. It just makes me accept and love who I am as a human being, scars and all. And I want the same for my children. I guess the best part is that I’m enjoying a drama- free hangover -free life which I guess is worth something. And I have no god to thank for that, only myself for having the courage wisdom and desire to make that change.



Monday, April 17, 2017

TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO BE FREE THINKERS



A thoughtful piece that’s truly worth the read

"Hi Unsure-mother. First off, though I am an atheist myself, I want to empathize a little: this must be difficult for you and your family. Your faith commitment is an important part of your life and it is bewildering to have your own child turn away from this. I don’t know exactly what you believe, but you might be worried about his soul in the next life, or his behavior in this one. If you don’t believe in God, how do you know right from wrong? If you reject God, how will you be reunited with Him in the next Kingdom?

The most important thing to understand is that these kinds of concerns, while very vivid and real to you, only make sense within a belief system your son no longer accepts. There is no sense in making threats of Hell or damnation anymore: atheists do not believe such a place exists. We don’t believe such a place could exist. The thing that is important to remember is that while we no longer believe that there are places beyond the world, the world he lives in has now become all the more important. That’s all we have. That’s all we ever have. His world is family, and school, and friends: all these things structure his life and he will need them more than ever. He needs you. He’s still a kid, and he’s a kid dealing with Really Big Questions in the only way he can: honestly and critically.

Most of us have come to this point honestly. This must be emphasized. We’re not angry at God, we’re not trying to get attention or going through some cultural phase. We looked at the arguments on both sides and came to the best conclusion we could. We only have 70 odd years on this planet. We make mistakes, too; we are fallible creatures prone to error and haste. We do our best. And sometimes our best is ‘well, I don’t think any of this is right.’ I don’t pretend to have all the answers. I don’t rightly know where the universe came from, or how life began at first. But I don’t need all the answers to know that some answers are the wrong ones. I don’t know, and I don’t think Christians, or Muslims, or Taoists know either. They claim to know; I claim to not know.

Suppose I’m wrong. Suppose your son is wrong. I’m standing outside the pearly gates and St. Peter, or God Himself, gives me one chance to explain myself. What would I say except “I’m sorry — I got it wrong. I really tried. But I got it wrong. I saw all the different religions, each saying different things, all changing over time. It seemed just a part of human culture, not ultimate truth. I saw unnecessary suffering and couldn’t make heads or tails of it, if you were good and all-powerful. It didn’t make sense to me to posit something existing to explain existence: that gets it backwards. I’m sorry, God, that I didn’t believe in you, but it wasn’t malicious — I just — I just screwed up.”

What would Jesus say to that? Would he send me to suffer forever? Do I deserve to be tortured eternally because I read Lucretius as a young man — the 2,000 year old Roman poet who professed his atheism before Christ ever walked desert sand? Because I looked at the ontological argument and found it wanting?

Or would he press me to Him and forgive me? And wouldn’t I desire that forgiveness?

If there is a God that would send me to Hell for making this mistake, I don’t want it in my life. Nothing justifies torture. Nothing at all. And He would not be worthy of worship–or even respect. If He is merciful, then I will apologize. If I am right–and he doesn’t exist–then I live my life as a free man.

And that is how atheists live: under actual freedom. The German philosopher Nietzsche wrote that ‘freedom is responsibility’ — genuine freedom. I am responsible for the consequences of my actions. So: how do I live? What do I do? Do I want to live in a society where everyone does what they can get away with? What standards do I hold myself up to? This is the essence of the atheist’s morality: his freedom, his rationality.

Before even Lucretius wrote his atheistic treatise De Rerum Natura, there was another man, Socrates, who asked a simple and startling question: Does God say something is Good because it is good, or is something good because God says it is? We must be careful here. If what is good is whatever God says is good, then we have no morality at all, but caprice. If God says: kill your son! it is good to kill your son. If God says: from henceforth, children shall be murdered — then it is good, by definition, that children be murdered. But that’s not morality. That’s authoritarianism. And if you say: “But God would never do that,” I ask: why? Because if there is a reason, then goodness is independent from God after all. It is grounded elsewhere. In what? Well: maybe in reason itself? Or maybe morality is just part of the universe — a different kind of part, not like your sofa or TV or the moon is part of the universe, but the way numbers, or relations (like ‘equal to’) — an abstract object, none less the real.

There is a very, very long tradition of ethical thinking that is, in fact, older than Christianity itself. In philosophy classes we teach wisdom that was recorded a millennium before Christ. If it is impossible to be good without God, there wouldn’t be one virtuous atheist. Yet there are millions of us non-religious men and women on the planet, and we live our lives, as best we can. Atheists don’t fill the newspapers with tales of carnage or debauchery — clearly we can figure it out on our own.

Well. Not quite on our own. We have each other. No one else — just each other. And that’s enough. So be there for your son."https://lifeafter40.net/2015/05/28/to-evangelical-parents-of-an-atheist-child/