It’s scientifically proven that children who come from abusive families or have endured trauma will negatively effect them into adulthood. However, everyone reacts differently to abuse. Some grow up to harm others and some harm themselves through addictions, cutting, etc. So why would the trauma of sexual mutilation at birth be any different? Especially when their sexuality has been permanently altered for life! (See IMPRINTING) They may not remember it but the amputation scar and sexual dysfunctions are something that can’t be “forgotten” or “healed”. Some boys don’t even realize they are different than the norm until they see a whole penis. When they find out the truth many will experience PTSD with this painful secret. Some will choose denial as a coping mechanism like many other victims of childhood abuse. Some refuse denial and confront their abusers causing a rift and separation between family and friends. Our culture has a very hard time accepting that some family members, even mothers, are cruel and dangerous and deserve to be ostracized for sanity and safety reasons. This is the greatest reason many men choose denial because who wants to admit their own mother could do something so heinous?
Those who remain in denial will suffer less outside confrontation but they are still victims of abuse and will find other ways of dealing with it. Although denial can be the easy way out it is of no help for future generations.
I come from a highly dysfunctional family of alcoholics and sexual predators. I broke out of denial and bravely confronted my abusers and it DID cause friction and separation. They refused to accept their wrongdoing, especially my own mother. It’s one thing to make horrible choices and apologize with remorse and accountability, but it’s another to make light of the abuse and refuse accountability. My mother could only say “that was the past, get over it, I did the best I could, only god can judge me, you’re over reacting” The very same words many victims of MGM hear when they confront their mother with their abuse. It’s no accident that mothers are given the greatest control in the hospital regarding their baby boy’s. It’s taboo to confront our loving mothers with our pain, anger, and distraught that THEY caused us!
I live to give a voice to other victims in the hopes of saving future generations from abuse. But the sad thing is, although I have lifelong emotional wounds, my body is not permanently altered. I can also go to a therapist or friend and get validation for my wounds whereas victims of MGM can not. Our society whether it’s doctors, therapist, family members or friends mock and ridicule these men. It’s the most shameful thing America continues to do to our men and I want no part of it. Silence is being a part of it, just like my siblings who choose to live in denial and continue relations with my toxic parents. I can comprehend it, but I can not tolerate. Speaking truth while exposing the lies is the greatest weapon against abusers and they fear it like the plague. Keep speaking no matter how much they try to silence you and even if your voice shakes.
